Last Thursday Jan. 7th our weekly residency URBAN'S HOUSE brought back the wonderful DJ Rush to not only celebrate his birthday party (because he wanted to do it at our party :), but also to witness an amazing 5 hour disco set by him!

 

Speaking of residencies, we have a new monthly party over at Betty's every 2nd Sunday called THE SERMON with resident DJ Craig Loftis.

I finally got to go back to my family home in Manila, Philippines after a 3-year absence. Me and my brothers were supposed to go last year, but that was also the time of the big economic crash, and needless to say our family was not immune to the ubiquitous losses that devastated everyone. Thankfully things are getting better and we were able to visit our parents once again.

SPOILED
I looove going back home, because we get spoiled, pampered and treated like royalty. We shop all day and night, then get stuffed and fed with all our favorite Filipino foods. The weather is a hot 85 degrees, the seafood is humongous and everything is so cheap! A one-hour massage is only $7! Can you believe that? TRUST that Miss Mirani was getting 2-hour massages everyday!

MY MOM
My mom is like me but magnified 50x over. She is wild, neurotic, vain, obsessive, impetuous, melodramatic and loves excess. Some of these pictures of our house should illustrate her personality as she pretty much runs the household. She is currently on hiatus from her love of ballroom dancing, and her latest hobby is creating videos of herself dancing and being glamorous. There are also videos of her dance instructors dressed up in her costumes, writhing sexually on the floor and lip-synching to Madonna/Whitney/Celine/etc. On Christmas Eve after a wonderful dinner at the Peninsula, she suggests we check out the Russian pole dancers at the casino and we happily oblige.

 

To all the leeches, moochers & bloodsuckers in my life: Please take note that my privileged life happens there, not here! So please stop assuming that you can get me to pay for your always broke ass. I am struggling just as much as you and have to deal with sycophants everyday as it is, entiende? Now back to our regular programming...

 

FAMILY
But best of all, there is nothing like being with your family. To be with my mom, dad, brothers, sister-in-law and nieces all in one room is a wonderful thing. I feel bad that we can only do this every 2 years or so. Not only that, but it's nice to be around educated people whose lives encompass more than just one nightclub per night. I will really miss the Philippines!

 

THE ISLAND OF BORACAY

 

MANILA

Asian airlines always better!
So after meeting my 2 older brothers who flew in from the east coast to Chicago, we all board the same American Airlines flight to Tokyo to meet up with our dad. And just as we suspected, Asian Airlines are always 100% better than their American counterparts... their staff are petite, sweet, very clean, subservient, easy on the eyes and elegant in their every move. Our airline was like being in a 24-hour diner complete with rude queens, bus-size buttocks and a 3rd class attitude. I mean for paying the $4000+ for Business Class, can you at least elevate your act some?

 

Tokyo
My dad meets us at the Tokyo airport after his flight from the Philippines and we head over to our very beautiful Grand Hyatt Hotel in the luxurious Riponggi District (think Rodeo Drive, Mighigan Avenue.) My room is a mini-apartment, and I want to run around and play with all the treats and goodies this room has to offer... the enormous white sunken bed, the shower the size of my bathroom at home, the hot tub, the toilet with 8 different ways to wash your butt... what glory! In fact even the public bathrooms are super clean, all with heated toilet seats and different wash options.

We shop, eat, shop, eat some more, then eat some more. The guys are fixated on the ritual of eating. I'm not, I'd rather run around and buy more shit. Everyone is so kind, so polite. The language barrier is serious, and even ordering at a restaurant is a total challenge. The bills between 4 people have ranged everywhere from a $500 dinner to a $300 lunch.

 

These Girls...
The Harajuku and Shibuya areas definitely do not disappoint, the way these girls dress is OUT OF THIS WORLD... like straight up fantasy land! (Ganguros, cosplayers, Lolitas, Gothic-Lolitas, I can't keep up with all the different categories.) And I notice too that for those with the fake light-colored hair (and they are 1 out of 2 girls walking around) they all seem to come from the same dye bottle... this cheapy brown-blonde look. All have super long hair, tons of eye makeup, thus emitting a half-whore-half-child look. Artificiality is the key. Colonial mentality is basking in its glory with the younger generation, it's like they're afraid to look Japanese. If you have a fetish for women dressed up literally as dolls, then this is the place to be. It's very entertaining to watch, although at some point it can be suffocating imagining what lengths they go to everyday just to pull off this highly synthetic look. No thanks!

 

Buy it!
I am having a grand old time shopping. Everything is so expensive, but the different currency diffuses the prices. I love going shopping with my dad, because not only is he infinitely patient but while I'm cleaning out the stores he is busy staring at the clerks. Yeah!

This last Saturday was the big History of House part 3 event held at the House of Blues. The first 2 were held at the massive Congress Theater, but I think I prefer the more intimate setting of HOB. Once again my dance group Fivestarboogie performed this time not for Steve Silk Hurley, but for Martin Boogieman Luna's 10-song megamix of all his greatest hits. We alternated between a group of bboys and it was short and sweet and peace out.

After the performance I headed my butt over to Red Dog to catch Osunlade's set. Something was making me irritable I don't know what, but I know I started snapping at random friends. I think I've been wrapped up in too many projects and situations that I've gotten so wound up. (That and my ponytail was so damn tight and my shoes were tortuous stilts.)

And last but not least, for those of you that are in Chicago please come to our early Christmas party this Thursday December 10th! (I'm doing Xmas early because I'll be leaving for the Philippines on the 15th.) We have special guest Farley Jackmaster Funk, our resident Rees Urban, and a very VERY special dance performance by my crew Fivestarboogie (show is at 1am.) And best of all it's free! How can you beat that? So come on out and show us some love and help us spread some holiday cheer. I'll be in a good mood I promise :)

BLACK WEDNESDAY
Wednesday night myself and David Sabat threw a Black Wednesday party called "JIVE TURKEYS" at Cuatro with DJs Gene Hunt, Craig Alexander & David himself. It was a really fun party, the music solid and the energy absolutely infectious! Craig Alexander's drunk ass kept telling me something about "licking my kidneys", so I did my usual giggle-arm-push-away-eyeroll-tactic. Then as the night progressed I started becoming like him, surely scaring away other people with my cannibalistic references. Afterwards we all head over to check out the last leg of Frankie Knuckles' party at Green Dolphin. It was different this time because in front of the stage was a FORTRESS OF SOUND....if Afghanistan wanted to have a party in the desert, that sound setup would have set them straight! Frankie was not on the stage because of all those speakers, and instead was djing off to the side on the same level as the dancefloor. It was a great way to end what was a fantastic night.

 

NO TURKEY NO PARTY
Waking up hungover at 7pm, I rush to cook our vegan thanksgiving dinner for me and Rees before he heads out to our weekly Thursday party URBAN'S HOUSE at Betty's Blue Star with special guest Lil John. I am so incredibly tired and full that I skip most of the festivities and head over to the club at the closing hour.

 

FRIDAY (ooh-la-la!)
Friday night we go to a private birthday party of D&E Entertainment's Frederick Dunson (they throw all the Frankie Knuckles parties) at his & Frankie's beautiful downtown loft. Talk about vip! Beautifully decorated, a full catering staff with tons of food and liquor, coat check girls and a door list guy to make you feel oh so special. Upstairs Erasmo is djing to a mini-dancefloor for those who wished to get down. Some of the illustrious guests were Terisa Griffin, Kenny Bobien, Ralphie Rosario and Robert Williams of the Warehouse.

SATURDAY
After a long day of rehearsals with my dancers in preparation for next week's Christmas show at Betty's (Dec. 10th with Farley, shameless plug), I party the night away at the newly relaunched Red Dog. That party was off the hook! It was totally like the old Red Dog, everyone came out! Upstairs were David Sabat and Julius the Mad Thinker, downstairs were Gene Farris and special guest Dennis Ferrer. You couldn't have asked more more energy at this party and it was so good to see so many old friends. Afterwards I show Dennis the wonders of late-night dining at Hollywood Grill, which at 5am on a Saturday night/Sunday morning is always a lovely sideshow disaster.

 

All in all, a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday.

PUSSY
So a lot has happened in the last few weeks that it would be hard for me to put everything down. As most of you know, my cat Alejandro of over 18 years recently passed and it's made the whole household very sad (dog, bird, girl cat.) So one day I see a tweet from a girl in Chicago saying there's been a tiny black cat coming to her door everyday for the past 3 days begging for attention. She posted pictures. He looked just like Alejandro. Long story short, I went to see him the next day and instantly fell in love with him. I wasn't trying to replace my old cat by any means, but the opportunity just presented itself out of the blue and the poor cat needed a home. (The good couple that found him wasn't allowed to keep any more pets.)

I won't talk about the terrible scare he gave us 30 minutes after the "adoption" when he jumped out of his carrier box and out the car...where 5 of us were chasing him down the street going through gates and alleys until he finally settled inside a locked car lot. Where 3 people (Rees, Raw Food Chris & Cat) had to jump over the barbed wire and wait for close to 2 hours to finally catch him from his darting from car to car, until finally it was Cat (yes I know the irony) with her soothing voice that finally retrieved the scared kitty back into our arms. We weren't going nowhere without him.

His name is Simon, he looks to be under 2 years old, a teenage cat. Ginormous eyes, a long and sad meow and strange sleeping positions on top of people. He's adorable. My older female cat Foxy is still in the hissing and growling stages at him, but I'm told this is part of the course until she gets used to the idea of him. I think he'll make a wonderful addition to our family.

 

UNEAQ
This past Saturday our November cover story, the live House band from San Jose Uneaq came and played for a 5 Mag party at Smartbar. I'm a big fan of live House, and it was my very first time hearing them. (They came last year but for some reason I missed them.) They did a fantastic job and were all really cool people. After that party was a little afterparty where I made my liver do bench presses. But considering I've been a good girl for almost a month now, I think I'm good.

This whole month of November is dedicated to my raw food detox/cleanse. I go to Karyn's Inner Beauty for the program, and have done it along with other fellow dancers on and off throughout the years. I absolutely love the results of what a raw food diet gives me: clarity, energy, weight-loss, calm (relative) and the ability to eat however much I want without counting calories! It's not always an easy process, and the fast is always a challenge for me. I definitely needed a detox at this point in my life, I felt like a nightclub toxic waste plant! Since going all raw and doing various cleansing processes I feel 100% better. I even bought a blender (my 1st), a food processor and a dehydrator and started making my own raw food dishes, which is so gratifying to me. It's nice being able to pig out on good food and not feel like shit. (Oh and speaking of that...)

So if you see my skin glowing, my hair shinier and my waistline smaller, SAY SOMETHING. We like it raw :)

So after 15 years of being a variety of bottle blonde shades, I have decided to go back to my roots. I am half Filipina half east Indian so my genes gave me an overabundance of hair. For those who knew me way back when, my hair in its natural state was jet black, super curly and all the way down my back. But then it got lighter, lighter and lighter and my hair started breaking like Rock Steady crew in 'Beat Street.' Then 2 and a half years ago I had a big show and decided it would be cute to sew in straight blonde extensions down my butt and keep it there for a few months. Sigh. There went the hair. It's really never been the same since.

So in an effort to regrow my hair in its natural and healthy state, I've gone back to dark. Anyone who has been a fake blonde for many years know that this is a deep, soul-searching process that can shatter one's fragile ego. Seriously. I nearly fainted when I stood up from the washing bowl at the salon and saw my reflection in the mirror. 2 of my stylists warned me and they weren't kidding. It's very hard adjusting your face to a different frame after so many years.

But you know what? I like it! After a few weeks of transitioning and occasional peeks at the mirror, it is growing on me and I'm happy with my decision. A lot of people tell me they honestly like it better. The only one who may be iffy is my boyfriend, who loves the stick-straight, fake blonde stripper-whore hair that many of his ex-girlfriends rocked. But not I said the fly.

 

BUT I WANT TO LOOK WHITE!
Having grown up in the Philippines, Colonial Mentality (like in all Asian countries) was in full force. You worship white, you want to look white. Do everything to your body to eschew your heritage. This might explain to you all those nasty car show "models" that give new meaning to the words fake, tawdry and vulgar. (Sorry, I cannot STAND import car girls. To me they go against everything their culture raises them to be.) But aside from these heffers, normal intelligent Asian women are also fallen victim to this. When will this blondie obsession die?

Although I went back to my natural hair for non-political reasons, doing so has made me re-examine my discomfort with all these issues. I have been guilty of this brainwashing, and I have many moments of recurring hypocrisy. But hey now when I look in the mirror, I see more me, and I'm loving it =)