She's Lying to You

While browsing through the relationships section of the bookstore, I had the unfortunate luck of finding a book that forever traumatized my already bitter outlook of men. It was aptly titled 100 Lies Men Tell Women. If you think the infamous bestseller He's Just Not That Into You is an evil tome on the lesser gender, this one made it look like positively Pollyanaesque.

So while chilling with some of my girls at the fabulous KStarke Records, I told them I wanted to write the top ten lies women tell men. We came up with ten in less than two minutes, so clearly there is a pattern.

Men, read on. A bit of warning though: just because a woman has said these things to you does not mean she was lying to you. It could be the truth.

It could also be a screaming lie.

Enjoy.

10) I'm 26.
09) Yes, I remember you!
08) I'm staying in tonight.
07) I was out (promoting/with Heather/with my mom).
06) I'm sorry, I've already got a man.
05) No, I'm not mad.
04) Yes, that feels good!
03) This was the best sex I've ever had!
02) Of course you're the biggest I've ever had.

(and song cue Biz-Markie please...)
01) He's just a friend.
("yoohoooooo... got what I neeheeeeeed...")

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